


In Two Months' Time

by arboreyes



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-17
Updated: 2018-03-17
Packaged: 2019-04-03 17:04:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14000640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arboreyes/pseuds/arboreyes
Summary: Sam had had amnesia before. But this time, he missed something big. Now, the trouble was getting Dean and Cas to admit it.





	1. Awakening

**Author's Note:**

  * For [jhoom](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jhoom/gifts), [Emi_theSassiestSousa](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emi_theSassiestSousa/gifts).



> Hey guys, first fic in several years (and ever on this site). Forgive me if I'm a little rusty. Here's the first chapter, the rest are soon to come.
> 
> This was inspired by an idea from A03/tumblr user jhoom (jhoomwrites.tumblr.com) and is dedicated to Emi_theSassiestSousa (sassysousa.tumblr.com).
> 
> Thanks, everyone. Enjoy!

Amnesia. Noun. New Latin, adapted from the Greek amnēsia—roughly translated, ‘forgetfulness.’ 

The total or partial loss of one’s memory by abnormal circumstances.

Sam knew the condition well. He’d seen it many times and experienced it himself on more than one occasion. So he knew, logically, that he’d come through this alright. He’d been through far worse before and, apart from the head wound, was perfectly healthy. Every doctor he’d seen so far assured him his memories of the accident would return soon.

But it had been two months…A lot can happen in two months.

For instance, Cas was back. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen the trench coated vigilante of justice before the accident. To be fair, the coma had lasted two months and a significant chunk of the preceding ones were also affected. He knew, however, that there was something different about his presence this time.

For as long as Castiel had been in his life, he’d remained an unknown variable. True to the lore of his kind, Cas was ephemeral. He’d flicker in and out of the picture as needed to orchestrate the greater plans for this realm. Even on those occasions where “angel of the lord” turned to “man of his own making,” Cas was still transient, gone off to another fight mentally if not physically. He’d never given himself fully to a life with Sam and his brother, Dean, no matter how much they considered him family. But, this time, it felt more permanent.

There was something about the way he sat by Sam’s bedside, tie loosened, slouched back in his seat. Something about the way he spoke, softly and without urgency. The way he used the door when leaving for refreshments, rather than going and returning in the blink of an eye. The way he watched whatever sitcom played on the small hospital TV and allowed himself to enjoy it, chuckling comfortably at the cliched storylines and truly laughing at Dean’s accompanying jokes. Which lead to the other difference...Dean. 

Dean seemed happy.

Now, there were a lot of things that made Sam’s brother happy. Burgers, babes, booze—anything that tasted, looked or felt good. But these were all shallow happiness. It’s why he binged them, receiving precious little emotional benefit regardless of the physical stimulant. There were few things that made Dean really happy. And most of them had to do with people.

Dean liked being around the people he loved. He liked helping them when they hadn’t even asked yet. He liked singing with them, dancing with them, laughing with them and being the one who made them laugh in the first place. While he may not have been a textbook people pleaser, he liked being a source of pleasure for the people in his life. Right now, Dean was that version of happy. And, as selfish as Sam felt to say it, he thought it was inappropriate. Every other time one of them had been in the hospital, it made the other a wreck. Especially comas, and even more so ones lasting over a few days. 

This time was different. When Sam woke up, he wasn’t greeted with strained smiles or held-back tears. He awoke to genuine warmth. It radiated from Dean, inside out like he had swallowed the sun. The crinkles near his eyes weren’t laced with pain from repressed emotions, but joy as his smile swept large across his face. And that smile hadn’t faded since the moment it arrived.

So what happened?

The idea that he could be the source of Dean’s happiness briefly flittered through his mind, but he dismissed it. There were no different circumstances here as far as he could tell. He was told he’d been in an “accident”—the usual. He came to in the hospital, bandages still encasing his head and Dean waiting patiently by his bedside. Nothing was different from the numerous other occasions of headwounds normalized in their line of work. Although, he supposed, there was Cas to factor into the equation. 

Castiel. The unknown variable suddenly turned prime number.

Castiel had been there by his brother’s side when Sam awoke. But, without memories of the accident or the time before, he couldn’t tell if that was to be expected. Maybe Cas was involved in the fight. Maybe he was the one to cause the accident and stayed out of guilt. With a moment’s consideration he quelled the thought. Had Cas hurt him, there was no way Dean could be this happy. Any form of strife between Sam and Castiel in the past had resulted only in anguish from Dean. It had to be something else, because this was the opposite. Dean, _and Castiel for that matter _, seemed joyful and content.__

__Glowing, some might say._ _

__As the thought locked into place in Sam’s mind, the realization dawned—this is it. Dean and Castiel must have finally gotten there. They must have admitted what they’ve kept shut away for so many years. Upon second glance, it was so obvious. The two were closer than ever before, which was saying something as Castiel was the only person Dean ever let get so close, outside of the bedroom. Over the past few years they’d seemed to draw each other in like magnets, closer every day but showing just enough restraint not to touch._ _

__Now, it was caution to the wind._ _

__Every time Sam glanced their direction, they seemed to be pulling apart from some form of contact. Nothing major. A hand slipping from a shoulder here. A knee tilting away there. Eyes struggling to find anything else of interest in the stark hospital room. Sam knew they’d become much more tactile with one another, but for some reason they were hiding it just out of sight. It was clear that they didn’t want him to know. So he said nothing._ _

__Or, he was planning to say nothing. But some secrets become too apparent to ignore._ _


	2. Remembering

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam had had amnesia before. But this time, he missed something big. Now, the trouble was getting Dean and Cas to admit it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, first fic in several years (and ever on this site). Forgive me if I'm a little rusty. Here's the second chapter; the third is soon to come.
> 
> This was inspired by an idea from A03/tumblr user jhoom (jhoomwrites.tumblr.com) and is dedicated to Emi_theSassiestSousa (sassysousa.tumblr.com).
> 
> Thanks, everyone. Enjoy!

When they finally brought Sam home from the hospital, Dean’s helpful attentions quickly became suffocating. Having spent the two months of Sam’s coma (plus the extra week after his awakening) doing everything for his brother, he found himself caught up in the routine of it.

“Hey look, I’m fine,” Sam insisted, shaking Dean’s hands from his upper arms as the man attempted to guide him into the bunker. “Really.”

Dean laughed and raised his hands in surrender.

“Sorry, Sammy. You know I just worry about you,” he said, taking a step back and allowing Sam to cross the threshold unaided. “Wouldn’t want you to fall and bust your head all over again,” he joked. “I’m sick of explaining shit to you.”

“Oh really,” Sam quirked an eyebrow—an expression missed by his two new caregivers as they followed him into the kitchen. “Cause you haven’t really explained much about the accident or…” He cleared his throat. “Other things.” Reaching the kitchen table, Sam turned to lean against the back of a chair, crossing his arms over his chest. “Anything you want to explain now that I’m all patched up.”

Dean and Cas exchanged a look indecipherable to the younger Winchester. It seemed to be a cross between what one would call “knowing” and “pleading,” as if both understood what needed to be said, but neither wanted to be the one _doing the saying _. A few moments went by and Sam held his breath, hoping this would be the moment the two would break.__

__“You see,” Castiel finally spoke, breaking eye contact with Dean yet still not making it with Sam. “A lot happened when you were…down.”_ _

__“That’s putting it mildly,” Dean chuckled._ _

__“Would you like to do this, Dean?” the angel countered._ _

__“No, no.” he said, head down, waving an arm in front of him. “Don’t mind me, the stage is all yours.”_ _

__This was starting out on an interesting note to say the least. Sam pulled out the chair he’d been leaning against and took a seat. “So, what happened?” he asked, smirk settling in on his face, ready for the big reveal._ _

__“For starters,” Castiel began. “I was captured.”_ _

__Sam blinked. That wasn’t right. He must have misheard._ _

__“Wait, what?” He drew his eyes from the straight-faced angel to his brother for reassurance this was just another of Cas’s poor attempts at deadpan humor. But one look at the grimace slowly creasing Dean’s mouth as he stared off at nothing in particular said just the opposite._ _

__“You were Captured?” he asked. “By who?”_ _

__“Demons,” Castiel spoke. “A large pack of them banded together assisted by a rogue angel.”_ _

__“You were-“_ _

__“Betrayed,” he completed. “Yes. By someone I trusted.”_ _

__Sam’s eyes shifted back to his brother. He stood against the island, whole body now set with tension—shoulders square, hands gripping the counter-top behind him so tightly his knuckles became tiny, snowcapped mountains. Sam’s stomach dropped and he cursed himself for prying._ _

__“God, Cas.” He exhaled and looked away, finding it difficult to see his brother so affected. “I’m sorry, man. I didn’t know.”_ _

__“It’s alright, Sam.” Castiel spoke gently. The dark look that previously graced his sharp features had all but disappeared. “I was able to resist. It took a lot out of me, but I escaped.” The angel’s eyes trailed from younger Winchester to eldest, and his gravelly voice softened almost imperceptibly. “I escaped and found the one place I knew I could always come. The people I know I can always trust.”_ _

__‘People,’ Sam thought._ _

__The word was kind. Sincere, even. But the way he said it, eyes brushing Dean’s form like a gentle touch, he knew the truth was more singular. His brother looked up to meet the angel’s gaze and all his hard lines seemed to melt away._ _

__“So you came here…” Sam said. “And then what?”_ _

__The two men started at the question, crash-landing back on earth, their visit to cloud nine cut short._ _

__It was Dean’s turn._ _

__“And then we took care of your ass, Sammy,” he joked from under batting eyelashes, forcing emotions back out of the conversation. “Don’t you remember? You were there for that bit.”_ _

__“Okay,” Sam accepted, ignoring his brother's antics and trying a more nudging approach. “So I had an ‘accident’ in a fight with…?”_ _

__“Well,” Dean spoke, exchanging uncomfortable looks with Castiel. “There was no fight.”_ _

__Sam laughed. “No fight?” They had to be pulling his leg. “What do you mean, no fight? I’ve got the head wound, th-the amnesia to prove it.”_ _

__“No, Sam,” Castiel interjected. “There was no fight this time.” The man looked apprehensive about the subject, but he couldn’t understand why._ _

__“So what,” Sam persisted, “it was an actual accident?”_ _

__He shifted eyes between the men and noticed the tension that had just disappeared from Dean’s shoulders slowly creeping its way back in._ _

__“Then what’s so weird about all this?” He asked. “If it was just an accident, what’s the problem?”_ _

__Castiel looked to Dean. For affirmation, for consolation—Sam couldn’t tell. But he was certain no one was going to give him more information until his brother got a handle on his emotions._ _

__“Dean,” he said, trying to mimic Castiel’s soothing tone. Somehow Cas always knew how to calm the man down, yet Sam hadn’t mastered it in the lifetime they'd spent together. He wished, for a moment, that he’d been able to know their mother. Dean always spoke of her calming presence, and it pained him to know that he’d never experience it for himself._ _

__Dean’s eyes remained glued to the floor. He massaged his hands together as if they’d been aching for some time and slowly exhaled the breath he’d been holding. “Well, Sammy,” He said, pushing himself from the counter. “The problem is that it’s all my fault.”_ _

__And, with muted intensity, Dean left in the direction of his room. Castiel called after him, but there was nothing to be done. He couldn’t handle the subject just yet and neither man wanted to make him._ _

__“Cas, what is he talking about?” Sam asked quietly after hearing his brother’s door shut behind him. “Is that true? Was the accident his fault?”_ _

__“Sam, I-”_ _

__“Cut the bullshit, Cas,” he interrupted. “Tell me the truth.”_ _

__Bright blue eyes finally left the doorway to meet Sam’s deep green._ _

__“The truth is…” he decided, “we’re all to blame.”_ _

__Following in Dean’s path, Cas left the kitchen. A few moments later and Sam again heard the click of the bedroom door._ _

__‘Damn amnesia,’ he thought. ‘What am I not remembering?”_ _


End file.
